Silver Lining

Have you watched the 3d animated movie The Croods? My kids loved it so much especially my little girl. She even mimics some sounds from the movie and giggles with action scenes.

image from google

Anyway, this post isn’t about a movie but rather the lesson behind it. The Croods’ family basically lived from fear justifying their survival from the jungle. Adventure is not what they consider as fun idea but rather a threat to their survival.

Browsing through the blogs i'm following, I saw Kim of Mom on Duty's blogpost about her experience about the negativity around her. All the while I thought I am alone in this negative soil but hey, I have sisters from another family pala! It’s not being happy about it and not even considering this as something to be proud of but at least someone other than me is braver to share a part of her.

The very reason why I don’t want also to share negativity in this blog is I don’t want to spread negative vibes to the people but as what Kim mentioned, this thing has to stop. People should be enlightened that there is more to life rather than sulk into too much paranoia.

I was raised as Catholic by my parents and went into Catholic school all my life. I have nothing against it. But growing up I had a lot of questions that were answered at least few years ago when things were clearer to me. People who have known me my entire life know how much hardship I went through. During grade school years, we were not allowed to join educational tours because my father believed that we will have an accident during the tour even if our extra curricular activities take part 30% of our grades, it doesn’t matter to him. He thinks we don’t need it. We weren’t allowed to socialize apart from our school time. Most of my days are spent inside the corners of our home. All my life I didn’t know the names of our neighbors and have at least a friend from my neighbors. I learned how to commute and WAS ALLOWED to commute during my last year in high school. He expects too much yet doesn’t support me well because he thinks I am not doing the RIGHT thing and I don’t KNOW what I’m doing.

I was pushed against the wall that I survived college years with determination to finish school despite the hullabaloos at home. There wasn’t any harmony at all. At some point I consider the place I live in as hell (sorry for the word). I had a lot of dark moments. My aim was to finish school and immediately get out of the chaos, which I proudly did. I was able to land a job in my own means and survived my life for years with the least help from my mom.

I wasn’t in any way proud of it. I wasn’t the perfect daughter too. During those times, I wanted to have a fair communication and harmonious relationship, all I get was one-sided conversation.

I was able to live life through it. There was still ample light that I see through amidst darkness. The only thing it taught me was to be strong and be content of the life I am in. I learned to be vigilant with my actions and words. I learned to celebrate life apart from the hullabaloos. I learned to be happy.

Let us not compromise the bliss we celebrate from life just because we are afraid of the unknown. Let us not create a ghost that we will be afraid of. It is never wrong to try new things and stumble and fall. All we need to do is to stand up every after fall.

Despite everything, I am still thankful of what I have become. I chose to find adventure in life and enjoy it the best way I can. I know that later on in life I will be able to spare my kids from the torment I had, I will practice open communication and support their future activities all the way.

Silver Lining.